The sea was blue and quiet. Not a sound could be heard for miles around, but suddenly a boat crossed the horizons. At first sight the boat was empty, floating in the hand of the wind but at a closer look a tall man emerged from the thin fog standing there , never moving an inch if he not needed to. Carl Heine was quiet on the outside but in his mind there was total chaos. Thoughts about his discussions with Kabuo both before he went on fishing and later on afterwards on the sea where hunting him. He always had the feeling that he had done the right thing, then he burst out in a completely silent laugh. He could even now see his mother’s reactions to what he had done, standing there angry as ever. He knew that his family would support him. Still, was it support he needed? He didn’t even know for himself what he had done.
With no delay he smacked his hand on the back of his head like there was an imaginary fly there. Why can’t things be simple, like fishing, you know what you have to do and you do it. No questions needed and you feel freer than ever, but again life is not suppose too be easy, it’s supposed to be cruel and hard, with small glimpses of light, or at least that was what his mother used to say and he couldn’t really disagree with her. He continued his thoughts about how much his mother meant to him but he just couldn’t see that she was right this time. He shook his head and said quiet, ”not this time”. Kabuo’s help with the battery was nice and all but it just made his decision more difficult. On one hand he had already promised to sell the land but on other hand no paper had been signed, he had just given his word for it… Then you put in that he had helped him when he didn’t need to and that he didn’t demand anything out of it, which he could have done easily. Also again he thought about that it clearly was the right thing but still you couldn’t shake off years of hatred for the Japanese and their kind. He thought about how his wife Susan Marie Heine would react if he told her about his thoughts and ideas, probably she would be worried and say that whatever he did she would stand behind him, meaningless word coming from a person you never truly known even when you were married to her. He couldn’t anymore separate the love to her body from the love for her person. He knew he had loved her as the person she was in the beginning of their relationship. Later, on after all the time they had spent together, he wasn’t sure the love was still there or if he stayed because of his love to her body and their children. It was first then he realized the lantern on his mast was still there, like the perfectionist he was he couldn’t let it wait until he came to the shipyard, because then people would see it and think oddly about him.
He moved to the mast with his knife in his left hand, and when he was there he started to climb up the mast. The boat was swinging like always but with one hand to the mast and one hand cutting the lanterns loose he was sure nothing could go wrong. Without a warning a wall of water splashed into the boat, making it unstable, with such a force that made Carl loose his grip of the mast. The time that passed after he got separated from the mast felt like days. First he got surprised about the event that took part and he couldn’t get things strait. Finally, he started to think about his children and his wife and he regretted much how he had thought about his love to her in his last time alive. He thought about Kabou and how he probably would be accused of the murder even though it was an accident from an old fool. When he hit the boat and got unconscious he didn’t reflect about that he was dying. He just took it as it came. A moment later he was gone, disappearing in to the never ending blue sea.
Författare (author): Axelhe